A Simple Thank You ~

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Yeah, I’m probably going to sound crotchety and old-fashioned. However, what I’m going to rant about is the almost forgotten concept of manners. Remember those? In today’s world, I find that many people have no recall.

And my particular rant on the lack of “thank you” in society has to do with my knitting. But I’ll start at the beginning . . . 

From the time I could print, my mom instilled in me the importance of actually putting pen (or pencil) to paper and writing a thank you note for birthday or Christmas gifts from family.  I still vividly recall doing this.  Within a week or so of the arrival of a gift, my mom would sit me down at the kitchen table to write a thank you note. And I admit, I much preferred being outside roller skating or playing with my paper dolls. But it was one of those early life lessons of doing something simply because it was the right thing to do. Therefore, when I had children, I raised them to do the same thing. And my daughter taught her children as well. However, sadly this is pretty much a thing of the past. 

When I returned to knitting about twenty years ago, I mostly made items for myself. My reason was that I didn’t think my knitting was good enough to give as a gift. But over these years my expertise with knitting has increased and I now find about half of what I knit is for others.

Due to technology, hand written notes have disappeared. To be replaced by emails or texts.  Or even a phone call.  And I’m fine with that. If the gift is acknowledged, that’s what counts. But I find it difficult to comprehend how a recipient can just ignore a gift someone took the time, money and effort to send. And if the gift is handmade, I find it even more baffling not to receive an acknowledgement.

I’ve made sweater tops, scarves, mittens, etc. for my daughter. She not only thanks me but she posts a photo on Facebook wearing the item I made. The ultimate thank you. A few years ago I made a sweater and hat for my cousin’s new baby. She also posted a photo on Facebook with the baby wearing the items. And recently, I made a cowl and hat for someone who was a dear friend of my son, Shawn. The day she received it in the mail, she posted a photo of herself wearing the items with effusive appreciation. By doing this, not only do I know people actually received the gift via the postal service, but they thanked me.  

In the past year, I knitted a baby blanket, sweater and hat for my nail tech.  She had already left the shop on maternity leave when I finished the items, so I left it with the owner of the shop to give her.  After about five weeks, I finally asked if, in fact, she had gotten the gift wrapped box.  Yes.  She had.  But I never heard a word from her. And because her hours didn’t fit my schedule when she was going to return, I moved on to another salon.

And earlier in the year, one of my cleaning girls informed me she was going to be a grandmother in July. Her son lived out of state and I felt her excitement about that first grandchild.  So I got to work knitting.  And again, I made a blanket, sweater and hat.  But before I could give it to her, she left the state to relocate near her son, daughter-in-law and upcoming grandchild. So I got the address from the other cleaning girl and mailed it off.  I never heard a word.  Finally, I asked the other cleaning girl who was still in touch with her if she had ever received it. Oh, yes! She had! She loved it.  Really?

In the scheme of things, these are petty annoyances. I know that.  However, I’m just beginning to wonder if a simple thank you becoming a thing of the past might be part of the problem with our society today.  Just wondering.

See you here next time……………..

13 thoughts on “A Simple Thank You ~

  1. Terri, I totally agree with you. I, too, was taught to thank people, in writing, for the gifts that I received. I’m certain that my daughter does the same thing but not sure if my son does. I guess that, sadly, we live in different times. I remember that when I was a mail carrier for over 23 years my patrons sent out and received many cards…Christmas, Birthday, Thank You, etc. but the volume decreased greatly by the time I retired. What a shame that people are too busy to thank somebody who was thoughtful enough to think of them,

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    • Oh! How I loved receiving those Christmas cards in the mail! It was just a very special part of the holiday season. Looking forward to the mail delivery for a few weeks. And even writing out the cards was special. I’m afraid technology decreased this act. Most people felt sending an ecard took the place. Just another example of the demise of the personal touch.

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    • Terri – I agree 1000%!!! My mother raised me the same way. Don’t blame you for being upset. Especially since they were handmade.

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  2. The way we were brought up is deeply ingrained in us. I firmly believe all manners, traditions etc. are being diluted with each new generation. I am 76, my beautiful daughter is 42 and still comments on the wonderful things she learned from me and most especially from Grandmom.

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    • I’m afraid you’re right on each generation diluting what you and I grew up with. And I don’t think this is for the good. I’m glad your daughter and mine see the importance of preserving many of the great things passed on to them.

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  3. Here I am spouting off and I forgot to thank the lady who puts everything in perspective for us….. do you know how much you are admired and dare I say “loved”. Thankyou Terri😘😘

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  4. Yes, it is a problem today…drives me crazy when I don’t hear from someone when I send a gift. Like your kids, my kids also send thank cards…hand written for gifts, even to Jim and I and I save everyone…not sure why but they do…I know you remember this, not only did we have to write a thank you but we had to include the name of the item received…that was a biggie…
    So is it part of today’s problems…yes. Thank you…hello’s, how was your day…on and on, all of that contributes…but to me especially social media and TV…those same thank you notes used to be part of family tv…what is family tv today…not sharing any good manners, that’s for sure.
    O.K. my rant is over…I have to get back to work here….
    Thank you for this post and for the little reminders that still mean so much to people…
    Have a great day Terri…

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    • I’m smiling, because yes, the item had to be mentioned. And if it was money, I had to say what I bought with the money. As a child, that didn’t make much sense to me. As an adult, I understood it was a personal gesture to the giver.

      I also have a box full of the hand written thank you’s, some with hand drawn pictures, from my grandchildren.

      Unfortunately, family TV, as well as dinner time, is mostly a thing of the past. There’s very little family viewing. We were very fortunate…..Father Knows Best, My Little Margie, I Remember Mama, I Love Lucy were some of the ones I grew up with. And my children had Lassie, Brady Bunch, Partridge Family, etc. A different time, for sure!

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  5. Came here to say thank you for your novels and to check in on you and your loved ones after the recent hurricanes. Hope everyone is okay.

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